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A...And Then
By Alesha Henley, Davis News
WINNING COLUMN-April 2002
This is the case of the missing shoe.
Have you ever wondered about those lone shoes thrown to the side of the roadways?
Since I am now a seasoned commuter, I have noticed this strange phenomenon with more frequency.
It is always a single shoe lying on the side of the road. I have seen flip-flops, sandals, sneakers, boots and more.
I have always wondered why someone would just keep going down the read after losing an item of footwear. Don't you think they or their passenger would notice if they had lost a shoe? Don't you think the brightly-colored toenails or holey sock would give them a clue?
As a commuter, I know the hectic and zoned-out personalities of drivers. But, I can't imagine being so set on cruise control and brain freeze, that I would not realize my bare foot was flopping around in the car.
I realize a workboot could bounce out of the back of a truck barreling down the highway and the driver wouldn't notice. But wouldn't a person notice a shoe flying off his foot and out the window?
I can also understand the lone kid's shoe left stranded if the kid was flopping his feet out the window going 70. But wouldn't a parent look over and see those tootsies wiggling about and realize a shoe was gone?
With the cost of shoes these days, I would swing a U-turn and scramble over the roadways looking for that soled escapee.
On those long commuting trips, your brain comes up with some funny stories and theories. And thus the case of the missing shoe begins.
My husband and I watch many cop, conspiracy, rescue and reality shows. And you see many of the "underworld," "black market," "spy gadgets," "fraud," and "disguises" of worlds the common person does not experience.
I have come up with several theories on the phenomenon of he lone shoes.
My first theory is that the single shoes are a sign or a marker for the "underworld." For a while you won't see any shoes and then you'll see them more and more. They alert others to what is "going down." I can just see theses questionable characters driving down the road and spying the lone shoe. The inconspicuously thumb through their shoe code catalogue and look up the "make and model" of the given shoe. Then they can figure out the code and what their mission is.
Along the same theory, the shoes could belong to spies and they're really cell phones (like the Get Smart guy). The shoephone battery dies and they toss it out the window and destroy the evidence.
The lone shoes could also have hidden devices in them. You have heard of all the ways a camera can be used to spy on people. Why not stick a camera on the side of the road in a shoe? Who would want to investigate a stinky shoe anyway? So, the next time you're driving down the highway and see a lone shoe, be sure to smile at the shoe just in case. Also, beware it might be one of those new-fangled devices that catches you speeding and sends you a picture of your smiling face.
Then again, it could just be a shoe that flopped out the window.
However, if any of my theories are right, I think the "underworld" industry is running out of shoes. I was driving back to Davis one week and saw a new kind of flag or sign. Someone had slid the sleeve of a flannel shirt over a mile marker and it was flapping wildly in the wind.
The case of the flannel shirt… |
